Saturday, August 28, 2010

Hoop-a-thon or Poop-a-thon?

Last night while my friends rubbed shoulders with a few of the Los Angeles Lakers and UCLA Bruin basketball players at the HDSA Hoop-a-thon,

I was at home potty training a two-year old at our very own Poop-a-thon! And, yes that is a mini-basketball hoop in the background!

First let me explain…while I am truly excited that Little Mister is finally interested in making this giant leap into big boy pants, it certainly doesn’t allow us to go very far from home without a little anxiety (on my part, of course)! Which is why we did not make the 45 mile trek to the north last night. Judging by the poop-a-thon that ensued with Little Mister last night…it sure was a good bet to stick around (Ew…tmi, right?).

Potty training aside, I am really bummed that I missed the Hoop-a-thon event last night becase it was the first appearance by UCLA Basketball Coach Ben Howland since going public with his family’s fight against Huntington’s Disease. Read the L.A. Times article here. The Hoop-a-thon was a fundraiser which raised money for research toward a cure and help for families who struggle with this devastating disease. I hope the fundraiser was a huge success and another step toward a future free of Huntington’s Disease.

Huntington’s Disease is the reason that Tall Man and I went through PGD IVF to conceive Little Mister, which you can read about here. We wanted to ensure that we did not pass on this deadly gene.

In the coming weeks, I’ll be posting more about Huntington’s Disease. It is just another factor in what led us to PGD IVF and now Embryo Adoption. Hopefully, I will also be posting an update on our current journey with Embryo Adoption. We are in holding pattern until we hear from our coordinator.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Consult with new RE

We met with Dr. K yesterday. I still think it is pretty unbelievable that God used someone in Kansas to get me to a doctor 80 miles to the north in Thousand Oaks! God’s ways definitely are not our ways!

The doctor spent more than an hour talking to Tall Man and me about our “goals” and our issues. We spent most of the time discussing two things…a) FET with donor embryos (our main focus for the meeting and reason we were there) and b) PGD IVF (figured we may as well discuss it since it was the way Little Mister was conceived).

Dr. K said this is OUR decision and we should consider three things in making that decision:
  1. Medical – Is what we are doing medically possible?
  2. Emotional – Can we endure the roller coaster of emotions in this process?
  3. Financial – Do we have the finances to go forward with our decision?
Fortunately, the medical outlook is good for me to carry a pregnancy; emotionally we have God holding our hands and a doctor who is an expert in the field; and financially, well…we don’t want this to break us. All things prayerfully considered, we are going with adopting embryos who are already babies waiting to be born rather than trying again with my (39 year old) eggs and creating more embryos.

Jen was so right. Dr. K is amazing, confident, calm and even gave us his cell phone number. Who does that? He truly cares. We were very impressed.

The best part about our visit was that they have a match for us. Hubby and I are a strange melting pot combination of ethnicities, which ended up making our biological son 25% Asian. Who would have ever guessed that Dr. K would have 25% Asian embies.

We are now headed on the path to adopt them and pray that everything goes smoothly from here on out. God is sooooo in control.

Today I am thanking God for everything and thanking my new friend and sister in Christ for her ministry.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

There's a Reason for Everything

Remember a few months ago when I posted our sad news about the negative beta? That post also contained a silver lining in that I was able to share the gospel of Christ to a non-believing friend who came to grieve the loss with me that night. You can read about it here.

Four months later (and after many victories of our Lord’s) my sweet friend committed her life to Jesus Christ for the first time. All because she now had the faith of a mustard seed that God has promised to grow.

I’ve learned that God uses the most difficult things to show His love and mercy to His people. While I can’t even explain how sad I was that we had to go through the failed transfer and the loss of those little lives, I am eternally grateful for my friend’s salvation that can never be revoked!

Saturday, August 7, 2010


Just got back from vacationing in San Diego! Had a great time at Sea World and the Zoo. It was such a joy to see Little Mister’s eyes light up from seeing the pandas or getting nose-to-nose with the hippos (through 12 inch plexiglass, of course). Even Tall Man was mesmerized by the polar bears and koalas!

One of the most memorable moments was at the Shamu Show at Sea World. For those of you who haven’t seen it, picture a gigantic killer whale playfully splashing the audience, twisting, turning and doing flips, and at times showing an almost human-like personality.

The name of the show was “Believe”, and I think that tagline pretty much sums up where our family is in our fertility journey. We “believe” that miracles can happen and “believe” that even though we have one miracle, all things are possible with Christ.

This weekend really made me think about how grateful I am to God for this precious time with my family. But, the thought did cross my mind that this may very well be the last hoorah for the Three Zees before we enter another round of cycling to (hopefully) grow us from the Three Zees to the Four Zees. Doesn’t have the same kind of ring to it though, does it?

After reading how another gal in in the EA “sisterhood” was matched in 9 days, we recently posted our family profile on the Miracles Waiting website. This was a first for us, but we are hopeful that God will lead the family of our future embryos to this site and find “us”.

I have to admit it was a bit of a challenge trying to summarize who we are in a couple of short paragraphs. I just have to remember that God is in full control of this whole process. Just like our Heavenly Father led my husband and I to each other nine years ago as if He hand-picked each of us and prepared our hearts…I truly believe that He is preparing a family for this major decision right now (the decision to allow another family to adopt their frozen embryos).

We are also waiting for our consult appointment with the new RE on August 19th. I am anxious for the day to arrive! I think about all of the teeny chilly babies and wonder if there is one out there for us. One who may someday be a baby in our arms. In the meantime, I just have to continue to ask God for patience and wisdom as we wait. We are open to wherever He is leading us next.

Prayer of my heart:
Dear Lord…you know how much my heart desires another child. You know my heart because you created it. Thank you God for the blessings of my family and the miracle of Little Mister. I pray that you continue to reveal your plan for our lives and show us which path you would like us to take next. I pray that it involves the blessing of chilly babies, but know that Your plan and Your will are always way better than mine.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Considering Embryo Adoption Options

I was inspired by this woman’s story of embryo adoption and how her journey gave God the glory every step of the way. You can read for yourself here.

I decided to reach out to her today and ask a few questions. Knowing that she’s out of state and has eight children including a newborn I didn’t expect to hear from her for a while.

Much to my surprise she emailed me right back and gave me information on her clinic (which is here in California), her doctor (Dr. K) and told me about the various routes to embryo adoption. One option (Snowflakes) I was aware of, but the others were new to me.

Miracles Waiting – a website where adopting couples and donor couples can post profiles and find matches. It is a non-profit organization, but to keep the site running they do charge adopting couples a $150 posting fee (well worth it, when you consider what it’s for).

National Embryo Donation Center (NEDC) – non-profit organization for embryo donation and adoption. Their program handles the medical, legal and social (education and awareness) aspects of embryo adoption (including frozen transfer at their center if you choose not to ship embryos locally).

As a result of my email dialogue with my new EA sister, I contacted Dr. K to get a consult AND asked Tall Man if we could check out the Miracles Waiting site.

My new friend sent me a cyber hug as I started the EA journey. Sending hugs to all of you who are also on the journey of EA. I pray we are hugging our chilly babies one day soon.